dunkside

Anybody wants to bet that it won’t take long for Shaq to throw someone from the Suns organization and/or a Suns player under the bus ?

He got those from twittering

My money is on Terry Porter (he’s an easy target) and Amare. I doubt he’d go after Nash, but he might. Depends if he already let go of the fact that Nash got the MVP in 2005 and Shaq came in second.

He’ll probably start off with something like “damn, it’s good to play with a REAL superstar and for a coach that can REALLY coach” and maybe throw in a “it’s hard to win if you play with a guy who’s injured half of the time” – you know, unlike Shaq himself who took 25-30 games worth of vacation every season when he didn’t feel like trying and played 67 or less games in 10 of his 17 years in the league. Most likely Amare will feel targeted by Shaq’s comments and will answer back, leading to another mini-feud for Shaq.

In fact, if Shaq gets traded a a couple more times, he’ll run out of people to feud with and will have to go after assistant coaches and towel boys.

General Shaquille O'Neal

Apparently Shaq has left a lasting impression on him.

Good times

General Danny Ferry, Shaquille O'Neal

East

Cavs – Pistons 4-0
Nuff said

Hawks – Heat 4-2
The Hawks have HCA and they played well the Heat during the season, but if Wade goes into G.O.D. mode, the Heat could go on to win.

Celtics – Bulls 4-2
Garnett missing the series certainly gives the Bulls a chance, but the Celtics should be able to advance.

Magic – 76ers 4-1
Dwight must be hungry, only not in the same way Shaq is.

West

Lakers – Jazz 4-0
With Bynum back the Lakers enjoy such a size advantage it’s not even funny.

Blazers – Rockets 2-4
Looks like McGrady will finally make it out of the 1st round. While on the injury list. EPIC FAIL.

Nuggets – Hornets 4-3
Tough pick. Both teams are good, but thin in the front-court.
I’ll pick the Nuggets just to drive another nail into AI’s coffin. 2 seasons with AI (and Camby) = 1st round exit. If in the 1st season without him they make it to the 2nd round, that can only add to his “legacy”.

Spurs – Mavs 4-2
The Spurs kept beating the Mavs when both teams were on top of their game, so why wouldn’t they do it when both teams are in decline ?

General, Playoffs

I’ve been saying it before, and after Tyrus was clutch against the Celtics, I’m gonna say it again: if Tyrus is open, he shouldn’t hesitate and just take that jumper.

Tyrus was a major reason the Bulls won the opener in Boston and when he hits that jumper he makes a huge difference, giving the Bulls an extra option if their guards are well defended and can’t get open for a shot. If him, Rose and Noah keep playing this well, the Celtics are in trouble.

General

First Garnett is out for the playoffs with a mysterious knee injury, then Danny Ainge suffers a heart attack. And now, this.

And it’s all the Celtics’ fault. They were told not to do it, but they went ahead and did it anyway – they signed Marbury and tried to get him a title. And now, the basketball gods are angry, my friends. And the Celtics won’t like them when they’re angry.

The Celtics are being hit with the 10 plagues for defying the basketball gods and signing Marbury to a contract. Garnett is out, Ainge got a warning in the form of a “minor heart attack”, the TD Banknorth Garden was overrun by frogs at every Celtics home game (or whatever those round shaped green wearing creatures were), and he won’t admit it, but Doc Rivers must have gotten the crabs.

What’s next you ask ? Let’s check the list. Water to blood (this must refer to Garnett’s injury) – checked. Frogs and locusts (they’re all green, some are fat and some are slim, it’s the fans at the TD Banknorth Garden) - checked. Gnats or lice – checked. Boils – checked. Next: DARKNESS. As in a dark arena. This means 1st round playoff elimination. Rejoyice Bulls fans, this will be the 2nd time in 3 years the Bulls knock out the defending champions in the 1st round.

There are more bad news, though. If the Celtics continue to defy the basketball gods and sign Marbury for next season, too, I fear Big Baby will be in big trouble (you know, 10th plague, death of the babies).

General Boston Celtics, Ray Allen, Stephon Marbury

The good, the bad and the ugly

The good: Shaq has been playing better and with more motivation this season than he did in years.

The bad: The Orlando game Shaq took a long piggy back ride on Dwight Howard’s back. Not being able to keep up with Dwight’s athleticism, Shaq tried to wear him down by leaning on him like an old boxer trying to slow down his younger opponent. 

The ugly: When that failed, Shaq resorted to some pretty obvious flopping. On one play Shaq tried to take a charge, only Dwight used a piruete and there was little to no contact, yet Shaq fell to the floor like a giant sequoia. He must have spent too much time with Nash, cause these days the flop is Nash’s only defensive strategy. But at least he has an excuse: he doesn’t have the size or strength or hops to keep up with younger, more athletic players and try to block their shot.

Stay classy, Shaq

The obvious flop mentioned above had Stan Van Gundy complaining, and for good reason. Here’s what he said:

I was shocked, seriously, shocked. And very disappointed cause he knows what it’s like. Lets stand up and play like men, and I think our guy did that tonight.

Not much to get upset about, right ? Well, guess again. Shaq did have something to say about it. He showed off his “class” again by lashing out at Stan Van Gundy, calling him a bum, a nobody (amongst other things) and calling his career a flop. Shaq also took swipes at Dwight Howard, Jeff van Gundy and Patrick Ewing as well. Way to stay classy, Shaq. 

Of course it’s not new from Shaq to show absolutely no character. In fact he has a pattern of trashing his former organizations and teammates. When he left LA he not only dissed Kobe but he went after the entire organization, especially Dr Buss, and the city of LA. Then when he left Miami he threw his former team-mates under the bus. He always was a petty, jelous, boastful, ego maniacal baby in a man-shaped whale’s body. But lately he’s been taking it to a whole new level. First he attacked Bosh without any reason after Bosh complained about the refs not calling 3 seconds on Shaq (without saying anything bad about Shaq himself), and now this. 

The Big Hypocrite

You know who must have enjoyed Shaq’s flopping the most ? Vlade Divac. After complaining and making fun of Vlade’s flopping, Flopzilla ended throwing himself on his back quicker than a 5 dollar whore.

While incoherently tring to explain how he flopped cause the rules required him to and how his flop was not really a flop cause he doesn’t do that,  Shaq said that “He (Howard) came with the same old, stale Patrick Ewing move”. Yeah, the guy who after almost 20 years in the league doesn’t have one single move (unless you count buldozing people over as a move) complained about someone else’s “old, stale move”.

At this point I hope the Suns miss the playoffs cause he just doesn’t deserve to be there. Not on account of his play – to his credit he stayed motivated for almost an entire season and might play 70+ games in a season for just the second time in 9 years – but because of his attitude. And if they do miss the playoffs, I fully expect him to take 35 games off next season and mail it in for the rest so he can be well rested for … his retirement.

General Shaquille O'Neal, Stan van Gundy

Knicks @ Heat

• The NBA. Where don’t anger a superstar happens. The Knicks were leading, at one point by 16, they answered a Miami run and seemed on their way to a win when Gallinari (perhaps inadvertently) hit Wade with an elbow to the face. The refs failed to call it, which made Wade mad. Next thing you know, Wade takes over the game, scores from every possible angle including two 3-pointers, rebounds, assists, plays excellent defense and wins the game for the Heat. The lesson to be learned by Danilo from this is that when you’re leading and on your way to win a game, there’s no point in giving extra-motivation to a superstar. Wade was playing great even before getting hit, but the hit not only incensed him, but got the public back in the game.

• Jamario Moon may fit much better with the Heat than Marion did. Of course this were the Knicks he put the stats up against, but still, 17 points on 50% shooting with 12 rebounds don’t look bad at all. If he can play defense, rebound and hit the occasional open shot, he could start and receive 30+ minutes per game, especially since the Heat had a big hole at the SF position.

• After winning the 3p contest at the All Star Weekend, Daequan Cook has been shooting 29.4 from the 3p line and 33.3% overall from the floor. He only had one game where he shot at least 50% from the floor. It’s doubtful that this can be attributed to him getting more attention from opposing defenses – an NBA coach shouldn’t need the Three-Point Shootout to find out Cook can shoot 3 pointers, and if there is any coach that just found that out during the All Star Weekend, he should be fired on the spot. It’s not due to overconfidence either -  Cook hasn’t been taking tougher shots than before. Perhaps it’s because he’s been putting more pressure on himself to make those shots.

• Nate Robinson was having a ball before Gallinari’s elbow busted open Wade’s lip. He was scoring and flexing his biceps, putting the finger gun back in the holster, sprinting back down court and so on. However, after Wade took over for the Heat Nate tried to do the same thing for the Knicks, only with the opposite result. D’Antoni tried to get him out of the game, the refs deemed the substitution illegal, so he had to wait for the next stop in play. At this point Nate knew he was going to come out of the game ASAP and of course he knew the reasons, however he kept doing the exact same thing that caused the substitution. As well as he’s been playing recently, that kind of dumb attitude was completely unnecessary.

General

First Paxson looks like he’s about to finally clean up his own mess. He makes a good trade, gets Salmons and Brad Miller to cover 2 of the Bulls’ needs (size at the 2 and scoring at the 5) and gets rid of Nocioni’s contract (the contract that he offered). Next logical step: dump Hinrich’s contract. The Bulls have their PG of the future in Rose, have Salmons at SG and could keep Gordon as a 6th man to offer scoring off the bench, so there’s no need to pay Hinrich starter’s money. But since his contract is not that bad, you could probably get expiring(s) and a late 1st round pick for him. Maybe the Magic could have been talked into taking him instead of Rafer Alston, since he’s a better 3p shooter (and he did it without Yao drawing attention and getting him open looks).

However, Paxson is in love with Hinrich, and as we all know, love is blind. Apparently it’s dumb too. So Paxson solves the logjam in the backcourt by trading away Thabo Sefolosha. Not only did Sefolosha have a rookie scale contract that runs till 2010 but he could have provided minutes as a back-up SF as well. He was a cheap back-up who could play multiple positions, which is exactly what a team in the Bulls situation needs. No wonder ESPN’s analysts voted this trade (from the Thunder’s perspective) as the best move at the deadline. Especially when having a cheap owner like Reinsdorf paying Hinrich that much money to be a back-up is a luxury you can’t afford.

Moving from the dumb to the illogical, Paxson made one more trade that didn’t make any sense: he transformed Hughes 2010 expiring in 3 smaller 2010 expiring contracts, using 2 spots on the roster in the process. It looks like the Bulls hope to get Jerome James’ salary back from the insurance company so uncle Jerry can save some more money, but even so this trade was clearly won by the Knicks. He may not have much value for the Bulls, but he does for the Knicks. They needed a SG, they want to please their fan-base by staying at least partially competitive till 2010, and Hughes can put up good numbers in a fast paced system like D’Antoni’s. Just check his numbers with the Wizards. So the Bulls should have at least get some cash and/or second round pick(s) from the Knicks. Oh, yeah – and Paxson got back Tim Thomas, who he banished from the team a couple of seasons ago. I just hope that this time he doesn’t try to kiss and make-up by giving him Tyrus’ minutes at the PF.

But the worst news was that Paxson was NOT stepping down as GM. I suppose he must be proud of the job he’s doing, or maybe he does everything he can to keep Hinrich close to him, and he knows that if he steps down, Hinrich is as good as gone and he’ll be left brokenhearted and an emotional wreck.

What is even more amazing that Paxson’s stupidity is the fact that despite the horrible decisions he took in the past 2-3 years there still are lots of Bulls fans that support him. Sometimes I think that the only thing stopping the Bulls fans from lighting the torches and grabbing the pitchforks to run his ass out of town is that 3 pointer he hit in the 1993 finals. It’s like it gave Paxson sort of an aura that makes Bulls fans almost completely blind to his monumental blunders. Sometimes it’s so powerful they even applaud his idiotic moves.

Of course, it’s not too late for Paxson to do the right thing and transfer Hinrich and Deng for 2010 expirings and picks. This way the Bulls could go after 2 superstars in 2010 while keeping Rose, Salmons, Tyrus Thomas and Noah. Then by filling out their roster with picks and veteran FA they’d become instant contenders for at least 5 years if not more. But if history is a guide (hint: it usually is) Paxson will hesitate, hesitate and then hesitate some more and in the end he will be too scared to pull the trigger and the Bulls will remain a mediocre team with little hope of becoming a contender. And for a big market team like the Bulls, with a great fan base and a history of winning that means you FAILED.

General

Marion for JO
Not much should change. Maybe Bosh’s rebounds will go a little up and maybe Marion’s stats will improve, but I doubt they will go back to his Phoenix Suns levels. On the Heat that means that Haslem can play his natural position of PF. I doubt Beasley will become as starter as many predicted, but maybe he’ll see more PT, especially if when JO gets hurt. Not much to get excited about here.

Nocioni and Gooden for Salmons and Miller
The real winners of this trade from a fantasy standpoint should be Francisco Garcia (who should move to the starting line-up for the Kings) and Tyrus Thomas (who doesn’t have much competition left for the PF spot with Gooden and Nocioni gone). Tyrus might especially benefit from playing alongside Brad Miller. This trade complicates the G rotation for the Bulls unless they dump Hinrich’s contract, so if they don’t, then Hughes will have some company on the bench – probably Thabo. Normally Salmons should get the starting SG spot, with Gordon as a 6th man and Hinrich playing less than 20 min a game.

Amare non-trade
The biggest winner however might be Amare as a result of a non-trade. By firing Terry Porter and getting back to the run and gun style that benefited his game so much his stats might go back close to last seasons’ post Shaq trade levels, which made him look like a legit MVP candidate. He’s not gonna get much MVP consideration but he could give a huge boost to the fantasy teams that own him.

General

NBA’s answer to “two girls, one cup”?
Two cooks, one recipe

1. Take an NBA franchise. Preferably one with a big number of fans that were dumb enough to come watch the team for years while it sucked or one who has just put the fun back into NBA basketball and made playing up-tempo fashionable again.

2. Mix with an owner who’s more interested in making a profit than he is in winning a title.

3. Add a full cup bucket of greed

4. Put away that teaspoon of common sense. You won’t need it.

5. Add a GM who is only allowed to make moves as long as they decrease the payroll. Preferably a former Bulls guard who scored the winning basket in the last game of an NBA final. After all, being able to shoot the ball basically means that you are more than qualified to build a title contender.

6. Sprinkle a lot of draft picks – some high in the lottery. Take those picks and sell them or use them on players who need a lot of playing time to develop and then don’t develop them.

7. Stir things with some horrible contracts that were either traded for (Shaq) or offered (Deng, Hinrich, Nocioni) by that GM and wait till the mix gets sour – or the fans get sour on the mix.

8. Do NOT, under any circumstances, add D’Antoni to your recipe. It will ruin it. If there are any traces of D’Antoni in your recipe make sure you remove them completely. If you ever thought about adding D’Antoni to the recipe, ask god to forgive you for those impure thoughts.

9. Wash everything in paralyzing fear of making a trade for a superstar and incommensurable love for the players the GM drafted (and then overpaid) OR propensity for trading for players because of their name/reputation without thinking how or even if they will fit into your team’s system.

10. Have everything served by a cheap coach who has no idea of how to use the tasty morsels he was given and tends to focus on the parts that should be thrown away and/or have expired already.

Enjoy !!!

General